


Pay Attention

by AvengersCompound (emilyevanston)



Category: Black Widow (Comics), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Blood, Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Femslash, Plot Twists, Public Sex, Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Weddings, dying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-04 18:25:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17309633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyevanston/pseuds/AvengersCompound
Summary: Your life with Natasha seems to be slipping through your fingers because you can’t quite pay attention.





	Pay Attention

You could taste the blood in your mouth.  Hot and metallic.  Worse still when you breathe in, it felt like shards of glass were being drawn into your lungs and each breath out was accompanied but a gurgling sound, like mud being pushed up through a drain.

You were fairly sure this was it for you.  You’d stopped feeling pain a while ago.  Endorphins had flooded your system dulling everything and making you feel soft and fuzzy.  You were still scared, but it was almost like you were looking down on someone that should be scared more than actually being scared yourself.

As the world started to lose focus all you could seem to focus on was her.

…

“You need to pay attention!”

You blinked your eyes confused.  It was your first day of training and Natasha had decided to make an example of you under the guise of teaching the group some defensive moves.  Five times you had been knocked on your ass.  Five times she’d yelled at you to pay attention in front of all the other recruits.

The thing was you could fight.  It just didn’t quite seem fair that you were expected to knock down the Black Widow on your first day.  What was next?  They’d bring the Hulk in here to wail on you for a while?

She pulled you back to your feet.  “We’ll try this again, shall we?  Now this time actually block me.  Don’t do whatever it was you were doing.”

You took a defensive stance and she came at you again.  You braced yourself and tried to get her leg out from under her, but she threw you.  You slammed into the mat with an ‘oof’ sound and squeezed your eyes shut.  You were never going to live this down.

…

“Hey, pay attention.”

You turned your head slightly at the sound of Natasha’s whisper.  Captain Rogers had been droning on and on and you had guessed you had zoned out.  She smiled at you.  That adorable little half smile of hers.  God, having a crush on your teacher was embarrassing.  That was something meant for teenagers and people in their first year of college.  Not for people who are going through the recruitment program for the Avengers.

Yet here it was, full-blown and ridiculous.  Something about that tiny hard-ass had crept into your heart.  Maybe it was just that you’d been put into too many thigh locks and you’d started thinking that your head belonged between those muscular thighs.  You just couldn’t help but want to bury your face in her red hair.  Or bite at those perfectly painted red lips.  You wondered what it would be like if instead of chewing you out, she used that mouth to eat you out.

“He’ll be done soon and then we can all go get a drink.”  She whispered.

Logically you knew she meant that everyone would go get a drink together.  You decided for a moment that you’d live in the fantasy world where she asked you out though.  You smiled back at her.  “Yeah, that’d be great.”

You returned your gaze to the stage, listening to what Steve said about a family and how it was important to protect each other as well as civilians.

…

“You need to pay attention to what you’re doing.  You could have been killed.”

The air rushed from your lungs as Natasha slammed you against a locker.  “I was doing my job.  The job you trained me for.”  You hissed back.

“That was not what I taught you.”  She growled.  “I taught you to be careful.  To make calculated calls.  To not get yourself killed.”

You were painfully aware of how close she was right now.  Even ignoring the way her forearm pressed against your chest, you could feel the heat radiating off her body and her breath against your skin.  If you just tilted your head forward you could kiss her.  You really, really wanted to kiss her.

“Why do you even care, Natasha?  I wasn’t any more reckless than Clint is when he just goes to the store.”

Natasha scowled and her eyes flicked from your mouth to your eyes to your mouth again.  “I don’t need two Clint’s on the team.”

A smile crept over your lips.  “Say what you’re actually thinking, Natasha.”

She scowled.  “I don’t know what you mean.”

You bit your bottom lip and watched her eyes flicked back towards it.  “Why were you so worried?”

“Because we’re a team.”

“Mmm… Natasha… tell the truth.”

Her eyes flicked from your eyes to your mouth and to your eyes again and she crashed her mouth into yours.  You wrapped your arms around her as she kissed you with a frantic need.  You tangled your hands in her hair and moaned into the kiss.

…

“Pay attention, now.”

You opened your eyes and pulled your head back up as it rolled forward.  Natasha’s fingers slid up and down you pussy sending tendrils of pleasure through you and it was getting harder to remember you were in a room surrounded by hundreds of other people.

The room was dark and the sound of the music drained out almost everything else.  The thud of the base going half the speed of that of your heart.  At the table in the far dark corner, you and Natasha could be anyone.  You blended in and faded into the background.  She was taking advantage of the anonymity.

“We can’t let them know what a dirty little girl you are now can we.”  She purred against your ear.

“Mmm … Nat… that feels…”  You moaned softly.  Your lips parted in silent pleasure as she pushed two of her fingers inside of you and curled them like she was beckoning your orgasm to her.

“Shh… you’re going to get us busted, l'vionachik.”

Her hand kept moving, her thumb rolling over your clit and her fingers stroking your inner walls.   You closed your eyes and moaned as an orgasm bore down on you.  You were going to be loud and there was nothing you could do about it.

…

“L’vionachik, pay attention.”

You smiled softly and shook your head a little.  You couldn’t stop staring at her.  You still couldn’t quite believe she was standing at the end of the aisle with you.  She looked so beautiful right now.  She always did but in the eggshell mermaid style dress, the crystals sewn into the fabric sparking in the sun, the way it played off the red in her hair, she looked like some kind of fire god.  Clint stood beside her grinning like an idiot.  You supposed you probably had a similar expression on your face.

You had been so caught up with how lucky you felt and how beautiful she was you’d forgot to listen to what was being said.

“I’m sorry what?”  You said, blinking

There was laughter from everyone and your cheeks warmed slightly.

“I asked,”  Teased the celebrant.  “If you took Natasha to be your lawful wedding wife.”

“Oh, I do.”

“Then by the power vested to me by the state of New York, you are now wed.  You may now kiss the bride.”

Natasha grinned at you and cupped your jaw, smiling brightly.  Her smile never left her face as she brought her lips to yours.  You closed your eyes, smiling just as wide and all around you was applause.

…

“I feel like you never pay attention to what I’m actually saying.”

You scrubbed your hands down your face and looked up at her.  This argument had been going around and around in circles now.  It felt pointless.  Like there was never going to be a way to resolve it.  It wasn’t even as if you disagreed with her.  You wanted children too, but the choices were either you had them or you adopted and there was no way an adoption agency would agree to give a child to two active Avengers and maybe you could carry a baby, but that was a big ask and you were still enjoying your job.

“I do, Natasha.  I just don’t know what you want me to do?  I like what I’m doing.  I don’t want to stop yet.”  You argued.

She collapsed down on the chair beside you.  “I just - I just -”

You could tell she was trying to be vulnerable with you, she just wasn’t great at that kind of thing.  She was very, very good at keeping her emotions in check and only showing parts that allowed her to manipulate people to get what she wanted.  You put your arm around her shoulder and she leaned into you.  Liho, the black cat that seemed to have adopted her, jumped up into her lap and head-butted her face.

“It’s just - I always wanted it and I tried to tell myself I was okay.  I wasn’t the maternal type.  I’d be a terrible mother.  It was probably good they sterilized me.  But I do want to be a mother and we’ve been married for 4 years now.  Each year we’ve been together I’ve seen it stronger and I - I just want to know if you see that too.  If maybe we can look into our options.  It doesn’t have to be now.”

“Okay.”  You said and kissed the top of her head.  “We can look into it.  I don’t know if I’m ready yet, but yes, I do think I’d like that.”

She smiled up at you and touched the tip of your nose.  “Thank you, l'vionachik.”

“It’s not going to be an easy process though.”

She smiled sadly.  “I know.  Nothing for me ever is.”

You leaned down kissed her softly.

…

“Pay attention to me, l’vionachick.  Don’t fall asleep.”

There was a bright light that cut through the fog and a face appeared through the thick fog around you and her face swam into view.  “Tasha?”

You were vaguely aware of people moving you and the pain returning to your body.  “That’s right.  Keep looking at me.  We’ve got you.”

“Tasha, what happened?”  You asked.  Everything was hurting now, but still dull and in the background.  LIke you were slowly becoming aware of something really awful.

“They blew the side of the building out.  You got trapped under the rubble.”  She said.  “You’re my little lion though.  You’ll stay with me.”

“I’m sorry, Tasha.  I didn’t notice.  I should have paid more attention.”  You sobbed, tears slipping down the side of your face.

“It’s okay.  You couldn’t have known.”  She said, her hand tightening in yours.

“We can try and have children, Tasha.  When we get home.  Maybe Clint will help.  I’m sorry I didn’t give you that when you gave so much of yourself to me.”

“It’s okay, l’vionachick.  We’ll figure it out when we get home.  Don’t worry about that now.”  She said leaning down and pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Don’t leave me, Tasha.”

“I won’t, my darling.  Just as long as you don’t leave me either.”  She replied.


End file.
